"I might start to hate myself."
A little self-hate can be a good thing now and then, when deserved. Certainly better than the opposite. Just make sure it motivates you to stop doing whatever it is that is causing it.
Yeah, at this point if I'm Ruijerd I'm like, "Hey, kid, I'll take the tsundere redhead from here. If we stick around you much longer, one or both of us is eventually gonna get 'overthinked' to death like that poor bastard over there...and over there..."