Need translation tips

[4zur3]

Any suggestions on what speaking style or accents should I use for this character: a female deity (Kami-sama) that appears and behaves like a young teen girl, speaks in masculine Japanese and some old-style words thrown in the mix.
My first consideration is to use something like Early Modern English / Bible English plus the Royal "We" as pronoun. I'm not exactly familiar with writing regional accents although I can read them just fine. Safer move is to use standard English anyways. Tips and suggestions please....

 

[justforthelulz]

@4zur3
I'm drawing a blank on the accent/style suggestion, but I'd like to know what series she hails from.

 

[4zur3]

@justforthelulz
The series is Zashiki Musume to Ryourinin. No chapters uploaded yet, I'm doing the first chapter now. It's just a matter of characterization. No problems with translating.

 

[justforthelulz]

@4zur3
A somewhat haughty ojou-sama attitude (minus any daintiness) then? It brings together the childishness of the teenage behavior and the airs of superiority (a deity, after all).

 

[YumGumYum]

@4zur3
pls add last volume + chapter info

How many chapters in this series ?

 

[4zur3]

@YumGumYum
20 chapters + 3 bangaihen

 

[bigtiddyoneesan]

Bang three hens?

 

[blackyawgdom]

If translating to english, use a little olde english spellings. And some Shakespearean.

 

[Halo]

https://www.ganganonline.com/contents/zashiki/
Looks like the "old guy" style 役割語. Definitely not Shakespearean or full-blown archaic, lmao.

@4zur3

Safer move is to use standard English anyways.

I'd go with that + occasionally mix in some old-fashioned words and expressions, but not to the point of it being excessive.
Find the English translation of Spice and Wolf light novel and use their localization of Holo's speech as inspiration.

 

[Richman]

"Thou fool!"
Holo's best line imo. Carries so much emotion.

 

[Halo]

@Richman They didn't use archaic pronouns in the official translation, it's just "you fool."
Instead, they occasionally used archaic in other, less obnoxious ways:

“’Twould be boring to do naught but eat.”

“’Twill last,”

“Hmph. ’Tis my cold heart. It needs must be kept warm,”

“Come, don’t make such a nasty face. ’Twas only a bit of a joke.”

 

[Richman]

@Halo
Then I probably read that in another manga.