1 Only Reason

[MangaDex]

 

[voliol]

Hey, this is cool.

 

[Kosera]

This is more of a review rant than anything else but i feel i have some things i can't stop myself from commenting on.

There is a golden rule to story telling, i cant remember who said it (some russian i think), but it goes something like this: "if there is a rifle on a table in the first chapter, it has to be fired by the second or third, or it shouldn't have been there on the table in the first place"

Although the premiss of an asexual succubus promptly being thrown down to earth for being asexual is pretty funny, i'm left wondering why the MC hasn't just killed herself already, its all so miserable and terrible yet she keeps on keeping on for no reason at all, give her some meaning, give her a goal, give her a reason to progress and grow as a person until the day she might be able to face her family again. That would make for something interesting to read. Make a point, stories are not something for just about anyone to just tinker with and then throw out there for anyone to see. Stories are powerful tools used for telling about things YOU want to tell about.

So stop taking the story (or yourself for that matter) so seriously, give the characters some motivation and an arc to follow (think of the rifle on the table) and don't add any more of them than is needed, for god's sake.

And also the art is really rough at best, but i'm very impressed by the amount being drawn. I can tell there is considerable work being put in. If you, the person drawing all this is stubborn enough to do all that has already been done without loosing confidence, there shouldn't be anything stopping you from improving, so long you actually try to improve.

 

[sadhentaiman]

what is the reason?

 

[leechXlurk]

@Kosera IIRC, it's "Chekhov's gun".

 

[IlaiaCorde]

Cankles. That is all.

 

[hawkflights]

I don't know why this is getting such low ratings. It's pure mood, and the rough art actually gives it a very distinctive look without sacrificing the expressiveness of the characters — there's never a doubt whether a character is being playful, is depressed, is feeling ambiguous about something, etc. The pacing is a bit rough, but I appreciate the black humour. Don't compare this to polished works coming from big Japanese publishers, just enjoy this as its own thing. As an honest "slice of life" story, I think it has a lot going for it.

 

[molosser]

@hawkflights

It's shite.

 

[stargazer6536]

me gusta ta bueno

 

[AnotherRat]

Buenardo

 

[adamb15]

I like it. Some parts are unstranslated and sometimes a girl is suddenly a boy or a girl which is weird, but the story is interesting enough and the humor is great. That fucking dogjin is pure gold.

 

[BabyPyroshark]

The art isnt that good compared to other manga but it also isnt horrible
The story isnt super good either but this is also clearly not some "i practiced from the age of 2" top tier artist and writer but its a person with a story to tell and the courage to tell it despite not being that good at it
I respect this guy for trying instead of hating your own art for being bad then not practicing thus staying bad
Just like me
And likely some more people that read this

 

[AnotherRat]

Dónde están las patas?

 

[Watercell]

Can someone tell me why this has such low ratings?

 

[Metroxylon]

@Watercell A lot of people bombed the rating. More than half people that rated give it 1. I think it's some people kneejerk reaction.

 

[Vofuro]

This is not so bad - it's just that the art sucks. Story itself would be quite a good slice of life!

 

[huttingham]

did something controversial happen? Why so many 1s? I only just started this but it doesn't seem bad enough to warrant that level of hate.

 

[Clancey]

@huttingham nothing controverisial happened, it just got 1 star-review bombing out of nowhere apparently.

 

[mynameisidioth]

lmao what is this