881707

[MangaDex]

 

[MegaAnime]

There was quite a bit of plot here

 

[CronosusCZ]

thanks for chapter... this one was really funny xD

 

[monkey123]

At first I was like
but then I was like (armor on Phiro)

 

[ieatass69]

The editing is pretty decent. There are a few minor issues here and there but overall, it's pretty good.
The translation quality, however, does need a lot of improvement. Just run your translation through a simple spellchecker and you will be surprised how much better it can be. Or if you can get someone to be a proofreader, even better.
All in all, it's a pretty good attempt considering it's your first work. Just keep doing it and you'll get better over time.

 

[Kuro20]

I don't think the chapter's working for me. Either that or I'm a bloody fool who got bamboozled.

 

[KeiosKod]

Agreeing with ass there. With regard to the typesetting, I’d say it’s a definite improvement from the chapters done before. As for the TL, it’s fine enough. Without addressing the grammar or phrasing themselves because you’re relying on MTL (it is fine, mind you), the only real issue I can raise is that commas aren’t used enough, but that’s a minor matter I can easily ignore. Appreciate the work.

Also. Bikini plus backpack. How could I have been so blind to the potential.

 

[beperov]

Get someone to proofread your translation, because halfway through it stopped making sense

 

[smolbaka]

Yes

 

[Richman]

Huh, i thought this would be abandoned, but nice work i guess.

 

[Cerberuz1]

Didn't she mean beast-tammer not beast-timmer?

 

[chronostriker1]

Doing some spell checking and grammar corrections right now. I got excited and uploaded right after working on it without actually re-reading it.

 

[Milanin]

@Cerberuz1 Tamer... one m
@chronostriker1 ↑ + "You're a whore"? It's a whore? Why would they say "you're"

 

[Jergens]

@chronostriker1 something I would suggest is to keep the spellings of the names from previous chapters for the sake of consistency, like Firo over Philo and whoever else may be translated differently.

 

[alannondarklord]

Firo/Philo needs a "Walking Karma Hazard" sign. She's far more of a danger to herself than anyone else but the collateral damage can be vicious.

 

[chronostriker1]

@Jergens I went with the spelling on the description here on mangadex. Honestly I didn't double check the previous chapters, I'm not going back to change that though.

@Milanin The line "It's true, you're a whore!!" its a concatenation of you are. Spelled out it would be "It is true, you are a whore!!" Pretty sure of all the mistakes I made, thats not one of them.

 

[starburst98]

So when they fuckin?

 

[chronostriker1]

I've updated it, ran things through spell check (granted didn't find much). Fixed some grammar and updated some of the translation choices I picked. Hopefully its better but if something specific needs to be updated let me know.

 

[phil777]

Even though the merchant's thoughts were very different, the perceptive adventurers had a feeling it was Onee x Shota.

Also, feels weird when a girl has one of my nicknames. D: That's the second one now too...

 

[RelM]

P20, shouldn't it be "Her boobs" not "my"? It looks like this is meant to be his thoughts on them pressing against him

P21, what's the JP here? The "I want to cum" might be "I want to leave/go" considering the context is that she wants them to get out of sight asap...