Haru x Kiyo - Vol. 9 Ch. 33
- Thread starter MangaDex
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The more we learn about Kiyoshirou's busted up family, the more this whole "I am going abroad to pursue my aspirations" (whatever it is those are) thing is becoming kind of disconcerting. I mean, on one hand it's his life and goals, he can't change who he is and you can't really blame him for having lofty goals no differently than the rest of his family (though, I get the feeling his brother doesn't really like that lifestyle but feels obliged to follow it regardless of his own feelings) but even his mother seems to be pulling double duty here to highlight just how ridiculous this looks from the opposite side.
Of course, part of the problem is that this book illustrates how fickle love can be and as charming as it is that they've found something special in each other despite being so different, but the fact that they're so different that Koharu has no chance of catching up with or even being in a similar position to him, to the extent that there's no discernible path for her to even follow him just highlights the problem. It'll just be him leaving to pursue his aspirations leaving her behind and if she wants to continue being 'with him', she'll have to put her life on hold waiting for him for half a decade or more. And even if he does return (or she goes to him) there's no guarantee that he wont end up being just like his mother with his attention entirely focused on his work to the neglect of everything else. Yet, Koharu is so timid, lacking experience and self-confidence that coupled with her growing infatuation for him... she's at risk of throwing everything away for the sake of being in love with a guy that has all but told her that he will neglect her almost as badly as his own mother neglected him. And she's basically already started stockholming herself into accepting that.
That said, I am not saying Kiyoshirou is a bad guy for being fixated on his aspirations, but it strikes me as selfish for him to allow this to continue. He knows what kind of future he's pursuing and it isn't one where he sacrifices some of his potential for the sake of love, but one where he's going to repeat the same mistakes his mother made, that have made him and his brother resent their family. And more than that, he's smart enough to see that Koharu is becoming increasingly co-dependent on him and she's the sort of person that needs to be with someone that can be attentive, caring, and available. And Kiyoshirou is two of those things, but if he's going to choose work over being the kind of man the woman he loves needs, then he's only choosing to hurt her by proxy. Even though their relationship has been charming and delightful, the best thing he can do for her now is to end things so he doesn't hurt her worse later and she can take what she gained from their relationship and work on developing confidence, experience, and become her own person again away from him.
I haven't looked into the raws and I don't intend to, but knowing the book is done, the only other way I can picture this book ending in a positive way is if Kiyoshirou realizes that love and family is more important than being a slave to your work. Otherwise a breakup end is the only good way both of them can truly live their best lives. Fundamentally, it's no different than being married to someone who's work has them traveling all year long and we know how those work out (hint: they don't). Some women can handle it, but most can't and the more you take that for granted the more likely it's going to eventually end in tears.
Of course, part of the problem is that this book illustrates how fickle love can be and as charming as it is that they've found something special in each other despite being so different, but the fact that they're so different that Koharu has no chance of catching up with or even being in a similar position to him, to the extent that there's no discernible path for her to even follow him just highlights the problem. It'll just be him leaving to pursue his aspirations leaving her behind and if she wants to continue being 'with him', she'll have to put her life on hold waiting for him for half a decade or more. And even if he does return (or she goes to him) there's no guarantee that he wont end up being just like his mother with his attention entirely focused on his work to the neglect of everything else. Yet, Koharu is so timid, lacking experience and self-confidence that coupled with her growing infatuation for him... she's at risk of throwing everything away for the sake of being in love with a guy that has all but told her that he will neglect her almost as badly as his own mother neglected him. And she's basically already started stockholming herself into accepting that.
That said, I am not saying Kiyoshirou is a bad guy for being fixated on his aspirations, but it strikes me as selfish for him to allow this to continue. He knows what kind of future he's pursuing and it isn't one where he sacrifices some of his potential for the sake of love, but one where he's going to repeat the same mistakes his mother made, that have made him and his brother resent their family. And more than that, he's smart enough to see that Koharu is becoming increasingly co-dependent on him and she's the sort of person that needs to be with someone that can be attentive, caring, and available. And Kiyoshirou is two of those things, but if he's going to choose work over being the kind of man the woman he loves needs, then he's only choosing to hurt her by proxy. Even though their relationship has been charming and delightful, the best thing he can do for her now is to end things so he doesn't hurt her worse later and she can take what she gained from their relationship and work on developing confidence, experience, and become her own person again away from him.
I haven't looked into the raws and I don't intend to, but knowing the book is done, the only other way I can picture this book ending in a positive way is if Kiyoshirou realizes that love and family is more important than being a slave to your work. Otherwise a breakup end is the only good way both of them can truly live their best lives. Fundamentally, it's no different than being married to someone who's work has them traveling all year long and we know how those work out (hint: they don't). Some women can handle it, but most can't and the more you take that for granted the more likely it's going to eventually end in tears.
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@fickleroger Sick fuckin thesis brother
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.. Can't say any better, @fickleroger
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Only 2 chapters into finale.
FredFriendly
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@fickleroger There have certainly been other series where the heroine's IQ is well below that of the MC who she is madly in love with yet endures the MC going thru extended years of schooling to reach his preferred profession and, in the end, becoming happily married. If Koharu is willing to wait as long as it takes, then good for her. Although she may be as dumb as a petrified log and could never "catch up" to her man in the intellectual sense, her sense of resolve is nothing to sneeze at. She certainly seems to me to be one of those women that "can handle it."
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@HammerU89
Different situation entirely. For starters, Shizuku and Haru essentially split up and didn't get back together until after college, so whether they were still informally set on each other or not neither had to put their life on hold while the other left to pursue their aspirations, rather they opted to do so separately and picked up where they left off years later.
Secondly, in doing so they reconnected on equal terms both having achieved their respective goals and making a point of balancing their aspirations and their relationship, something that had been one of the overarching themes of the story forcing them to grow as people and make hard decisions about their relationship and respective futures. There was even a scene with Shizuku's workaholic mother, like the one with Kiyoshirou's mother from this chapter, where she tells her the opposite of what Kiyoshirou's mother said, that if she wants both she has to work twice as hard for it.
@FredFriendly
Of course, I am sure there have been but at least in my experience with these stories, it usually isn't scenarios where one side completely leaves the country like this. Normally, we're basically talking about different schools in the same or other prefectures which isn't that much easier but it's a fundamental issue of accessibility. Someone could conceivably take a multi-hour train ride to another prefecture or even relocate, but it's significantly harder when you're talking about a plane ride to another country. Not to mention that short of Japan's more prestigious universities if it's just about going to college elsewhere it's a lot less difficult to keep up or follow them even if you aren't pursuing the same subjects, but going abroad is a different story.
Further, you also have to consider their respective outcomes. In most cases, you're talking about going away to college and coming back to a normal career, but Kiyoshirou and his mother have both basically told Koharu in no uncertain terms that his career takes precedence over her and if he's anything like his mother, it will always be that way (and we have good reason to think this, back when he went to visit his grandfather he was so wrapped up in the work that he didn't even bother to call her and even when he realized it, he still chose not to bother). It's one thing if you're going away to return to a normal career but it's very much another if nothing will change and you working becomes indistinguishable from when you were away.
If you think she can handle it, I don't think we're reading the same book. When Kiyoshirou bugged out last minute to visit his grandfather she was on the verge of breaking down almost immediately the moment she didn't see him in class and even though she had only just met Edogawa for the very first time that day after dropping by Kiyoshirou's house, her unhealthy co-dependence immediately shifted over to him and she spent the entire time Kiyoshirou was away clinging to Edogawa and was still barely hanging on for dear life.
And ever since Kiyoshirou left that first time and she started to get an inkling of what both him and his family were like, she's been desperately trying to convince herself that she'll be 'okay' when he goes. And it only got worse after he told her of his plans (not to mention how she nearly had a breakdown just before that thinking that he was going to break up with her.) At this point, Koharu largely only exists as an extension of her infatuation with Kiyoshirou. It's right there in her monologue and thought process, she's no longer even thinking about her wants and needs just how it will be okay when he's gone because she can't think of anything else but him. That is the furthest thing from a healthy attitude. She's losing herself in her affection for him and doesn't realize how irrational her thought process has become.
Different situation entirely. For starters, Shizuku and Haru essentially split up and didn't get back together until after college, so whether they were still informally set on each other or not neither had to put their life on hold while the other left to pursue their aspirations, rather they opted to do so separately and picked up where they left off years later.
Secondly, in doing so they reconnected on equal terms both having achieved their respective goals and making a point of balancing their aspirations and their relationship, something that had been one of the overarching themes of the story forcing them to grow as people and make hard decisions about their relationship and respective futures. There was even a scene with Shizuku's workaholic mother, like the one with Kiyoshirou's mother from this chapter, where she tells her the opposite of what Kiyoshirou's mother said, that if she wants both she has to work twice as hard for it.
@FredFriendly
Of course, I am sure there have been but at least in my experience with these stories, it usually isn't scenarios where one side completely leaves the country like this. Normally, we're basically talking about different schools in the same or other prefectures which isn't that much easier but it's a fundamental issue of accessibility. Someone could conceivably take a multi-hour train ride to another prefecture or even relocate, but it's significantly harder when you're talking about a plane ride to another country. Not to mention that short of Japan's more prestigious universities if it's just about going to college elsewhere it's a lot less difficult to keep up or follow them even if you aren't pursuing the same subjects, but going abroad is a different story.
Further, you also have to consider their respective outcomes. In most cases, you're talking about going away to college and coming back to a normal career, but Kiyoshirou and his mother have both basically told Koharu in no uncertain terms that his career takes precedence over her and if he's anything like his mother, it will always be that way (and we have good reason to think this, back when he went to visit his grandfather he was so wrapped up in the work that he didn't even bother to call her and even when he realized it, he still chose not to bother). It's one thing if you're going away to return to a normal career but it's very much another if nothing will change and you working becomes indistinguishable from when you were away.
If you think she can handle it, I don't think we're reading the same book. When Kiyoshirou bugged out last minute to visit his grandfather she was on the verge of breaking down almost immediately the moment she didn't see him in class and even though she had only just met Edogawa for the very first time that day after dropping by Kiyoshirou's house, her unhealthy co-dependence immediately shifted over to him and she spent the entire time Kiyoshirou was away clinging to Edogawa and was still barely hanging on for dear life.
And ever since Kiyoshirou left that first time and she started to get an inkling of what both him and his family were like, she's been desperately trying to convince herself that she'll be 'okay' when he goes. And it only got worse after he told her of his plans (not to mention how she nearly had a breakdown just before that thinking that he was going to break up with her.) At this point, Koharu largely only exists as an extension of her infatuation with Kiyoshirou. It's right there in her monologue and thought process, she's no longer even thinking about her wants and needs just how it will be okay when he's gone because she can't think of anything else but him. That is the furthest thing from a healthy attitude. She's losing herself in her affection for him and doesn't realize how irrational her thought process has become.
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@fickleroger you are amazing at explaining exactly what im thinking!!! thank you :)
