Here U Are - Vol. 1 Ch. 124
- Thread starter MangaDex
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I don't agree with the grandfather pressuring marriage but I understand his feelings; he is lonely and is afraid Huan Wen will be, too. He genuinely wants his grandson to have the full emotional experience of having family connections that he wasn't able to experience as a child.
I might be wrong, but seeing how much the grandfather cares about Huan Wen, honestly I don't think he would reject him if he comes out as gay. If Huan Wen finds a partner, regardless of gender who can love and accompany him throughout life, then I think the grandpa will feel at peace.
I might be wrong, but seeing how much the grandfather cares about Huan Wen, honestly I don't think he would reject him if he comes out as gay. If Huan Wen finds a partner, regardless of gender who can love and accompany him throughout life, then I think the grandpa will feel at peace.
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Man this sucks i mean it happens irl so much i know but seeing it happen like this being its witness is so... like grandpa i understand but shut the hell up like he says he wants to live alone and yet ure like “ill rest in peace then” like what kind of manipulation? Such a big unnecessarily big responsibility he is putting on his shoulders it’s maddening this is why i hate family bruh i just hope that the guy actually talks to him and stands his ground on not wanting to date anyone. If the hag is lonely he can adopt a pet or something? Leave him alone i hate shit like this
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I relate to this kind of pressure very much. I know that the grandpa has a valid side but the way he says things is very manipulative either way. Also, are pink hair and grey hair going be the 2nd pairing to become a couple, since Uncle and other guy didn't work out? We have been clowned by thy author.
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lmao this is the reality. The grandpa is just worried about his lineage being halted due to his grandson's actions. I hope Djun explores the different types of ways gay people choose to spend their life. I'm personally hoping The girl turns out to be a lesbian and they both get together out of necessity. imo if Aniki can do it, so can I.
@raitei044
It is not senseless pressure, it is merely a survival instinct. They do not want their lineage to be done. It's really simple. I do comprehend that you understand what they are getting at but like the baby fever is very real along with the ticking clock. the more you age the less eggs you'll have. the window of having kids will close and you'll end up a leftover woman. I say you attempt marriage and giving birth before you look towards adoption. I hope everything works out for you.
@raitei044
It is not senseless pressure, it is merely a survival instinct. They do not want their lineage to be done. It's really simple. I do comprehend that you understand what they are getting at but like the baby fever is very real along with the ticking clock. the more you age the less eggs you'll have. the window of having kids will close and you'll end up a leftover woman. I say you attempt marriage and giving birth before you look towards adoption. I hope everything works out for you.
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@ribbitribbitsaga And that's why I think it's senseless. We're not in a period where continuing bloodlines by ensuring all your children have kids is a must. Furthermore, unless the woman's family is more influential, the child will generally take on the father's name, in which case it's mostly the father's lineage and legacy being continued, not the mother's.
Also, I'm a leftover woman if I don't give birth? A lot of couples nowadays make active decisions to not have a child. Would we say they are leftover people? What do you even mean by this phrase?
Loneliness isn't exclusive to people who don't choose the road of marriage and childbirth, and I'm more than sure that I would feel even greater loneliness if I force myself to get married and have a child just because. My parents have 3 kids, and they gave birth to me, their first child, in their mid-30s. So often, I would hear their grievances about having to wed and live with each other because they were getting old and not because they are truly and deeply in love. The so-called ticking clock should never be the reason why we spend the rest of our lives with somebody.
Also, I'm a leftover woman if I don't give birth? A lot of couples nowadays make active decisions to not have a child. Would we say they are leftover people? What do you even mean by this phrase?
Loneliness isn't exclusive to people who don't choose the road of marriage and childbirth, and I'm more than sure that I would feel even greater loneliness if I force myself to get married and have a child just because. My parents have 3 kids, and they gave birth to me, their first child, in their mid-30s. So often, I would hear their grievances about having to wed and live with each other because they were getting old and not because they are truly and deeply in love. The so-called ticking clock should never be the reason why we spend the rest of our lives with somebody.
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@Raitei044
We actually are in a period where continuing our bloodlines is a must. This BBC article from 2018 covers the declining worldwide fertility rate. https://www.bbc.com/news/health-46118103 That whole tangent at the end of the paragraph is confusing. The mother's legacy is morphed with the father's legacy. If you're talking about names, maiden names are documented.
Yes technically. No to be a leftover woman is to be single and childless, focused on a career. Here is a vogue article covering the term and a documentary SK-II made about the term. https://www.vogue.com/article/sheng-nu-leftover-women-sk-ii-viral-video
I see now, I think the reason why you are not convincing of the status quo. Your parent's constant bickering has affected you greatly. I do agree that you need to love somebody to procreate with somebody, but as the BBC articles explains, the birth rates are declining.
We actually are in a period where continuing our bloodlines is a must. This BBC article from 2018 covers the declining worldwide fertility rate. https://www.bbc.com/news/health-46118103 That whole tangent at the end of the paragraph is confusing. The mother's legacy is morphed with the father's legacy. If you're talking about names, maiden names are documented.
Yes technically. No to be a leftover woman is to be single and childless, focused on a career. Here is a vogue article covering the term and a documentary SK-II made about the term. https://www.vogue.com/article/sheng-nu-leftover-women-sk-ii-viral-video
I see now, I think the reason why you are not convincing of the status quo. Your parent's constant bickering has affected you greatly. I do agree that you need to love somebody to procreate with somebody, but as the BBC articles explains, the birth rates are declining.
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@ribbitribbitsaga birth rates declining has a lot more to do with how expensive and difficult it is to have children than people choosing to be alone 
let people who don't want to have children not having fucking children!! there's already way too many people in the world having kids for shitty reasons. We can't have kids for the sake of having kids. Kids need loving and supportive parents as well. Not going to have that if their parents never wanted them in the first place. If governments would better support mothers and have more financial supports in place for people who actually want to have kids and start families, I promise you birth rates will go up. Don't need to be expecting people to have kids just because. FUCK that shit and that mentality.
I completely agree that the grandpa might be meaning well, but it is entirely selfish and manipulative to expect Huan Wen to have children and a family. The mentality that a family is required in order to be happy is entirely outdated and short-sighted, and incredibly offensive to those that grew up in unhappy families with abusive family members (not to mention the ace/aro community!!). I'm completely on Huan Wen's side when he says he has friends. Obvi grandpa hasn't heard of found family. My friends are like an extension of my family and I am forever grateful to them. I, personally, am in a spot where I feel happy enough with my career, friends and current family. I don't mind being the super aunt. I don't feel empty nor lonely without children or a companion. Maybe it'll happen in the future? who knows. But I'm not going to hold my breath. I'm going to be happy now, with or without a partner, and that is entirely in my power. I don't need a romantic partner to validate me.
*gets off soapbox* Whew! This brought out a lot of feelings in me, hopefully we see Huan Wen happy, hopefully with Yuan since he is pining for him so
let people who don't want to have children not having fucking children!! there's already way too many people in the world having kids for shitty reasons. We can't have kids for the sake of having kids. Kids need loving and supportive parents as well. Not going to have that if their parents never wanted them in the first place. If governments would better support mothers and have more financial supports in place for people who actually want to have kids and start families, I promise you birth rates will go up. Don't need to be expecting people to have kids just because. FUCK that shit and that mentality.I completely agree that the grandpa might be meaning well, but it is entirely selfish and manipulative to expect Huan Wen to have children and a family. The mentality that a family is required in order to be happy is entirely outdated and short-sighted, and incredibly offensive to those that grew up in unhappy families with abusive family members (not to mention the ace/aro community!!). I'm completely on Huan Wen's side when he says he has friends. Obvi grandpa hasn't heard of found family. My friends are like an extension of my family and I am forever grateful to them. I, personally, am in a spot where I feel happy enough with my career, friends and current family. I don't mind being the super aunt. I don't feel empty nor lonely without children or a companion. Maybe it'll happen in the future? who knows. But I'm not going to hold my breath. I'm going to be happy now, with or without a partner, and that is entirely in my power. I don't need a romantic partner to validate me.
*gets off soapbox* Whew! This brought out a lot of feelings in me, hopefully we see Huan Wen happy, hopefully with Yuan since he is pining for him so
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lul
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GODDDD i feel so bad for huanwen i'm crying
