Review an anime correctly but wrongly

Fushigi Yuugi - Reading the wrong book can get you killed

Escaflowne - everything bad that happens is your fault, you negative Nelly
 
Dr Stone

A few kids says something isn't possible in the stone age and jimmy senku neutron does it.
 
Monoke:
Doctor doesn't actually heal anybody; uses position to pry into people's business and domestic abuse issues. Has a life-or-death fight against a pile of incense sticks.

Gundam 00:
Al Qaeda, but good, except not really.

Higurashi:
Backwater teenage hicks discover the true meaning of friendship after burying a corpse together and almost killing each other.

Higurashi Kai:
3000 year old loli actually some kind of insect possessed by a sheep. Day is saved thanks to the intervention of Karate Cop.

Girls und Panzer:
Ex-Nazi battles a colorful range of lovable international stereotypes to save her school from being shut down.
 
Asobi Asobase- A girl who likes killing virgins, a butt-laser beam loving girl, and a girl that hates males except for gay males meet up in a class room after school and play around, defeating whoever may appear in their way
 
All JoJo Parts:

Phantom Blood- Man gets an asshole step pseudo brother that admits to being asshole in ultimate asshole move (and then turns into a vampire.)

Battle Tendency- The sexiest man alive proceeds to go on adventures with his mom and his Italian and possibly bisexual bromance friend. They then fight Mayans that are also vampires who have bodies that are so insanely buff that every androphile just wet themselves.

Stardust Crusaders- Asshole step pseudo bro comes back and gets superpowers, but jokes on him because everyone has superpowers but one person who's superpower is slowly killing her. Hijinks and memes ensue.

Diamond is Unbreakable- This peaceful town is full of the weirdest fucking people I swear to god like why is everyone a pervert, a serial killer, an attempted murderer, or some mixture of these? Also hands.

Vento Aureo- Metrosexual Mafia proceeds to deal drugs to children. The italian love child of asshole pseudo step bro does not approve of this and proceeds to yeet everyone in opposition until he gets the most powerful ability ever.

Stone Ocean- Miley Cyrus proceeds to be falsely imprisoned and then proceeds to have a series of ever increasing conflicts with a Gay Hispanic Priest until she almost turns into a snail and the universe gets reset.

Steel Ball Run- Jesus tells a paraplegic cowboy to kill the president of the United States and so he and his metrosexual Italian immigrant friend go on an adventure to recover all the parts of Jesus's corpse.

JoJolion- WHAT THE FUCK IS EVER HAPPENING HERE LIKE GODDAMN HOLY SHIT THIS IS AWESOME BUT HOLY FUCK
 
Pokemon:
30 year old man pretends to be 10 year old child and beats up children and forces animals to fight for sport, eventually earning a championship win
 
Arifureta Shokugyou de Sekai Saikyou (Season1):
Because apparently it will have Season 2

A Light Novel Speedrun, with barely any commentaries.
 
Iron-blooded orphans: Orphaned child soldiers learn that using child soldiers its fine as long as they are the ones doing it, but only to save mars.

also, don't tread on me
 
End of Evangelion:
Jim Jones 2015: Don't just drink the Kool-aid, be the Kool-aid.

Inuyasha:
Dog training in feudal Japan.

Takahashi Rumiko Gekijou Ningyo Mori(aka Mermaid Forest tv)
Eet Moar Chiken.
 
Knights & magic

The MC follow the tread of: the cutest you are the most powerful you'll ever be.
 
Monster:
Les Mis meets The Fugitive during and just after the fall of Eastern European communism.
 
The World God Only Knows

Every troubled heart falls for this man's keikaku

(Honestly this was really hard because every joke I could think of was just a legitimate description of this series)
 
Naruto

Sasuke runs away again while everyone screams "no jutsu"

Bleach

Would've been better with guns

One Piece

They still haven't found it

Log Horizon

Less log, more horizon

My Hero Academia

Reverse X-men

Rascal Does not Dream of Bunny Girl Senpai

A good romance disguised as a terrible science class

Fairy Tail

Gray: I am straight up not having a good time
 
Fullmetal Alchemist

Two guys look for rocks

Your Name

Girl finds her dream boy

Made in Abyss

Two kids one hole
 
Katekyo Hitman Reborn

Local loser fights the mafia with the help of a baby

Dragon Ball Z

Local idiot saves the world with the help of screaming and gravity defying hair

Dungeon Meshi

Local adventurers eat monsters to save money

Bleach

Japanese man has all the powers - Aizen probably

Enen no shouboutai

Firefighters fight fire with fire

Fairy Tail

Friendship is magic and i have the most friends - Natsu

Kyou kara ore wa

Local delinquents dont know what a delinquent is

Kumo desu ga nani ka

Local spider min-maxes to get out of hell
 

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