Tell us, what's bothering you ?

The fact that no matter how well I play the game created by existing power structures, most money and power is found in creating new power structures and forcing others to integrate into it. Both of these require social skills that I seem ill-equipped with, requiring me to put in work to discern how exactly one develops these type of structures so as to secure financial and career stability, while simultaneously having to hold onto the fact that I don't seem fit for the job. And that in the end, for all it's worth, I have very little ability to push my own way forward alone considered the manpower required for most projects of any note.

On the one hand, I don't care about social achievements, on the other hand, social power seems to be the only way for me to get access to resources I need to move forward.
 
It's bothering me that I might have altered my brain.

I used to get annoyed when finding scanlations with a poor quality of translation.

But that somehow changed after reading several machine translations of light novels. (to get ahead of the human translations)

This came as a shock to me when I read a complaint about some chapter's bad translation.
Somehow it hadn't bothered me that it was a crappy translation!

Maybe it's not really a problem that I trained my brain in a weird way.

Because it deson’t mttaer in waht oredr the ltteers in a wrod aepapr, the olny iprmoatnt tihng is taht the frist and lsat ltteer are in the rghit pcale. The rset can be a toatl mses and you can sitll raed it wouthit pobelrm.
 
I ate a slice of ham this morning, but the taste was weird, it had a chemical flavor that I had never tasted before. I had to spit it out and put it in the trash just to be safe. Maybe that's why I'm hungry rn even though it isn't time to eat yet.
 
I have obligations and I'm procrastinating big time. Figuring out why a restore from a HD didn't work as I thought it would on an OS I don't use, getting a flu shot so I don't get sick when traveling and miss work, early voting.
 
Work may deny my application for long term disability, but I don't feel mentally equipped to go to work as I currently am. Have been searching for another job for a couple months, but nothing seems too promising yet. If I was actually capable of just shutting up, suffering and performing my current job my life would be a lot easier due to the pay, but it doesn't really matter what the pay is to me, because I just can't handle it anymore.
 
Fuck slow drivers. I don't ask you to be a speed demon but kindly let me and other people pass if you're gonna be a snail on a one-lane street. This dude was driving 25 or so on a 30-35 limit street and 3 cars got stuck behind him. Think I saw him smoking a cigarette, too, so seems like he was relaxing a little too much. Idiot.

Also, called the station and they open 24/7, except lunch time, lol. Was told to just bring in whatever will be helpful for the investigation. Alright. Easy peasy.
 
I am deeply troubled by whatever shit editing meme brought us the incredibly useless word "saintess." I swear I've never heard it before the last few years, and no spell check recognizes it. Do you people realize that "saint" is not a gendered word, and there is no meaning actually lost by translating whatever the original Japanese is to the non-gendered actual English word?
 
I feel like I don't deserve the happiness that I have. Like an imposter in someone else's shoes. I want to accept the happiness, but I'm scared that I'll be told to calm down or something. I've been told that ive been ungrateful for telling people not to treat me like garbo, and it's something that just keeps making me feel worse. I just want to be happy, and I don't want to be stepped on anymore.
 
@Lovecure
I've been told that ive been ungrateful for telling people not to treat me like garbo
those are the same people that while hitting you, they say: you are hurting my hand! you need to compensate me for what you did!
they are not worth any thought.
 
I still can't use altgr to write the at symbol, even after I turned my computer off and on again, what the hell?
 
@sterven
WTF?! My altgr key somehow got rebinded to alt somehow, that's why it doesn't work. How do I bind it to altgr again?
 
Now I've lost all of my tabs full of mangos ;_;
and my keys still don't work ;_;
just end me ;_;

I just remembered I had shit that had already ended and I don't remember if I bookmarked them before reading!! AAARRRGGHHH
 
@Richman
Heh, rookie mistake (not that I open tabs like a fucking psychopath though). You should always make sure to at least mark it as Plan to read before tabbing out.

@Lovecure
I don't know your situation, but you are worthy of being loved by others, and most importantly, yourself. It's arguable if it's better to wholly reach that conclusion innately or through substantial struggle, but I would personally go with the latter. When you eventually feel like you're in the right place, you'll be far more grateful to yourself for taking the necessary steps to reach it. Gambatte, friend.
 
Thank you all for your encouraging words, I wrote a response earlier but mangadex went all database error on me so it's gone now .__.
I'll try my best, its so hard nowadays because I have to share a space with these people everyday
 

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